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Moving Sucks

December 9, 2011

Baba and I moved to a larger apartment last week. Well, he was in Philly for work for most of that time, so I was really the mover. Then when he came back he had to work all weekend, so I was left unpacking the boxes. Please note, I’m not complaining about his job. I’m just stating the facts in order to get to my point. Luckily my sister came into town and helped me out.

But I’m exhausted. I’m genuinely beat down and I don’t like it.  I’m hoping this weekend will help revive me. There’s still so much to do. Namely put some furniture in the second bedroom. It’s nice to have a second bedroom. My main goal is a desk, even over a bed. That way I can have a space to work and get on my computer. I have so many photos that need some processing. Also, I gave up on NaNoWriMo because of the move, but I have not given up on the book, so I’m anxious to get back to it.

However, I’m really weird about my home. Everything must be clean, put away, and organized or I can’t think straight. I honestly think part of my fatigue is due to the state of chaos in the house now. I look around and I mentally tick off everything I have to do, and if there is a box in the middle of the floor (and there are currently many) I mentally put it away every time I look at it. I understand that this is not a healthy reaction, but everyone in my family will agree that this is how I am. I like things clean. Really, really neat. And white. I happen to know that most of my family puts away a lot of stuff when they know I’m coming over, not because they are messy but they know that the stuff stresses me out, and I’ll just start picking it all up myself and finding places to hide things. I feel bad for having this reaction, mostly because I know it’s my problem. I’m the crazy one. This definitely stems from having grown up in the chaotic house I did. There were just so many kids, plus parents who both worked and who both have a hard time throwing out things. It wasn’t that the house was dirty. It just wasn’t ever tidy. I can distinctly remember thinking as a child that my house would not have tchotchke in it. None. Not one piece. And if I had to have things, then those things would be hidden away. I wanted my counters empty, my tables empty, my floors clean and clear of trip hazards. I was going to have a white house, no brown – not a touch of brown in the whole damn thing.  And glass doors would be outlawed.  This was a goal of mine when I was a kid. What kid dreams like that? Even now that I’m an adult with an interior design degree, I have trouble buying things that are there for purely decorative purposes. Empty rooms calm me.

I had a friend (cough*Amy*cough) whose mother liked things clean and she made my friend do chores on a regular basis (so mean! :-)). I was fascinated. My friend hated it of course but I always offered to help, not just because getting them done faster meant we got to go back to playing or doing whatever we were doing at that time. I really didn’t mind the cleaning. There was a point to it. It wouldn’t be messy again in a few short minutes at her house. In my house there was NO POINT. Tidying up was the fastest way to get the universe to point a finger at me and say “Just kidding, SUCKER!” My friend thought I was nuts – and she was right. But whatever.

(This is the point where, if I were in therapy, my therapist would click his pen, say “Interesting” and start writing notes down furiously.)

My point to this fascinating insight into my psyche is that I’m tired. And the boxes are not helping. Actually, it’s the scissors on the table, the pens on the counter, and the hammer on the side table that are bothering me most. These things need to be put up! And until I get it all done I’m going to be tired and out of sorts.

God help my future kids.

Microsoft Clip Art

6 Comments leave one →
  1. December 9, 2011 2:22 pm

    Clutter upsets me, too, though I’m not a clean freak. I hate moving, too. Hope you get your stuff put away soon. When I’m stressed I just start throwing things out or donating them. Good luck.

  2. December 9, 2011 2:31 pm

    Congrats on the move to a better apartment. Try not to stress so much. Just jump in where you are and remember it doesn’t have to be perfect. Love you.

  3. December 9, 2011 2:44 pm

    Funny, what I remember most is you coming to my house *when I wasn’t there* and cleaning my room. It was GREAT!

    Chaos is absolutely tiring. Our house is never, never clean/tidy–at least not all at one time–but that’s one of the reasons I have such a hard time. Even me, the one who still has piles of clothes on the bedroom floor. The constant list of things to do and stuff that needs to be put away and cleaned and, and, and. . . Yes. Very legitimate reason to be exhausted.

    But to tag on to Leslie’s thought–just do the first thing. And if you don’t know what the first thing is, do the thing right in front of you.

    Glad you have a place for a desk! That’s one of my goals for our next house: a space where I can close a door and work/write.

    • December 9, 2011 3:02 pm

      Yep, I totally did that, didn’t I. I think I missed my calling as a professional organizer.

      • Kelly permalink
        January 23, 2012 8:51 pm

        I would hire you 🙂

  4. Carrie permalink
    December 9, 2011 3:00 pm

    I agree – moving does SUCK! However, it is a good excuse to throw things away and re-organize, so once that is done, it’s a good feeling!

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